The give and take of genealogy

I don't mean to be a buzz kill, but I have a bone to pick.

Over the years that I've been doing genealogy research, I've corresponded by postal and electronic mail with hundreds of my fellow genealogists. Some of these exchanges have been very beneficial to my family's research. Many have been short, due to a lack of common ancestry. Most have been pleasant. But I'm finding that the number of impolite, demanding, selfish researchers appears to be on the rise.

I don't know whether people are so used to dealing with an opportunistic juggernaut like Ancestry.com that they forget to say "please" and "thank you", or if they never learned in the first place. I get these excited notes from people who think we have ancestors in common, saying how they're really eager to share information. That's what it's all about, right? Right.

The problem is that, increasingly, I spend my time and thought putting together the details and sources that pertain to our common ancestors, only to find that once I've given this subset of my fellow researchers what they want... I never hear from them again. No shared source documents. Not even a thank you.

I think that's wrong.